By: Morgan Topol

I’ve always viewed criticism as a double-edged sword: one side positive, the other negative. The difference? One side is used, often intentionally, to make you better in the long run. The other is used, often intentionally, to hurt you.

I became a competitive musician at 11 years old, which means I’ve received tons of criticism within that domain alone. Fortunately, most of the criticism, especially the qualitative criticism I’ve received, has been overwhelmingly positive.

My score sheets from the Raleigh Area Flute Association, an organization that hosts year-round competitions for flute players in the Triangle, are a perfect example of this type of criticism. As you’ll see below, the judges would provide me with extensive comments after playing my pieces for them. Although some would probably view the meticulousness as “nit-picky,” I’ve always been grateful for the critiques, as they made me a better flute player.

I’ve also received an abundance of quantitative criticism from my time competing. From 6th grade all the way through 12th grade, I auditioned for the NC All-District Band. For these bigger competitions, the auditions were blind, and I received strictly numerical scores in the interest of preserving fairness. Although these critiques weren’t as descriptive, I’m still just as grateful for them, as they also made me a better flute player – especially from a technical standpoint.

Unfortunately, not all criticism, regardless of whether it’s qualitative or quantitative, is positive. Sometimes, people will criticize you not in the interest of making YOU better, but in the interest of putting you down to make THEMSELVES feel better. Negative criticisms like these are often seen in bullying and ad hominem attacks – and you shouldn’t tolerate them.

Understanding the difference between positive and negative criticism is a key skill that everyone should learn. Sometimes critiques that seem the harshest are still positive, justified, and intent on making you better. Sometimes critiques that appear harmless are actually negative, unjustified, and will leave you worse off. This is where things can get confusing.

If you’re someone who empathizes with this confusion, here’s my advice: before all else, ask yourself what is actually being criticized. Is it your actions, opinions or output, or is it you? If it’s you, that’s usually a bad sign. This is especially true if the criticism is coming from someone in a position of power, who may have an interest in wanting to feel superior to you and others they view as being below them.

With that being said, I’ll end with this. If you’re someone who has given me positive criticism that has made me better in the long run, I sincerely thank you for your efforts. If you’re someone who has given me negative criticism that has left me worse off, I have nothing to thank you for.